Is My Partner Living a Double Life? (5 Warning Signs)

Does my husband have a secret life? Am I the other woman (or man)? If you’re asking yourself such questions, your other half may be hiding something. Many people living a double life do so without their partner(s) ever knowing.

Your partner may act secretively, hide their phone or spend days away from home without explanation. Hiring a private investigator that offers matrimonial investigation services is sometimes the only way to uncover the truth.

At Global Investigations, our detectives are experts in spotting the warning signs of a double life. Today, we’ll explain why some people live secret lives and share five clues to watch out for.

What Does Living a Double Life Mean?

If someone is living a double life, it means they’re leading two very distinct lives, and keeping one hidden from the other. Their ‘secret life’ may involve:

  • An extramarital affair
  • A second spouse or family
  • An addiction (e.g. gambling, shopping or stealing), sometimes resulting in debt or legal trouble
  • Illegal activities, such as dealing drugs
  • A secret job (e.g. working as an escort)

A person living a double life will go to any length to hide their secret from their partner. Some people even create a second identity using a false name. Often, they are only caught through professional investigative techniques such as covert surveillance.

What Is the Psychology Behind Living a Double Life?

The urge to live a double life usually stems from deep psychological issues. The person views part of their personality as shameful and cannot reconcile it with their ‘other’ self.

For example, their compulsive urge to steal conflicts with their desire to be seen as a good person. They therefore compartmentalise their kleptomania and hide their thievery from those close to them.

In other cases, they’re ashamed of their homosexuality or bisexuality. So, they marry someone of the opposite sex while secretly having affairs with people of the same sex.

Whatever the reason, living a double life always involves secrecy and deception. They hide a part of themselves out of fear of what will happen if others find out.

How Can You Tell if Someone Lives a Double Life?

If you’re worried about your spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend living a double life, you probably have a gut feeling that something is wrong. People of all genders can have secret lives, and the signs of a woman living a double life are the same as for a man.

The only way to find out for certain is to have a private detective conduct matrimonial surveillance. However, these five tell-tale signs might indicate that your partner is hiding something.

1. They’re Often Away from Home

If your partner spends a long time away from home, this may be cause for suspicion. For example, they take regular weekends away for ‘work’ or ‘family’ reasons, and never invite you along.

Of course, there could be an innocent explanation. But if you struggle to get hold of them while they’re away, or they won’t tell you their exact whereabouts, they may be living a double life.

2. They Have Unusual Boundaries

It’s healthy to have boundaries in relationships. But does your partner set limits that seem extreme or unreasonable? For example:

  • Refusing to add you on social media
  • Not allowing you to meet their family, friends or colleagues
  • Being unwilling to discuss certain topics, such as their past or finances

If they’re trying to keep you separate from the rest of their life, and can’t explain why, they’re probably hiding something.

3. Their Stories Don’t Add Up

People living a double life weave complex webs of lies, and sometimes forget what they’ve said to whom. They may share details about their past that differ from what they’ve told you previously.

Maybe they’ve changed their story about where they were last weekend. Or perhaps their spending habits don’t match the job and salary they claim to have. In any case, if something doesn’t add up, consider it a warning sign.

4. They’re Extremely Protective of Their Devices

A person living a double life will usually be protective of their devices. For example, they may:

  • Insist on privacy when using their phone or computer
  • Turn off their screen when you enter the room
  • Regularly delete their emails, text messages and browsing history
  • Refuse to let you use their phone for any reason

They may even have a secret second phone. A private investigator can help if you suspect this to be the case.

5. They Avoid Simple Questions

Often, someone living a double life will avoid basic questions such as where they’ve been or what they’ve been doing. They may give a vague answer, change the subject or even make you feel guilty for asking.

When you question their suspicious behaviour or catch them in a lie, they’ll act defensively or even aggressively. They may even gaslight you (cause you to question your memory or sanity).

How Could a Matrimonial Private Investigator Help?

If you’re wondering “is my husband living a double life?” it’s time to contact Global Investigations. We are a world-renowned detective agency offering a range of business, legal and private services.

Our highly experienced private investigators are ready to unearth the truth about your partner’s secret life. We’ll use professional techniques such as covert surveillance, GPS tracking and online investigations to reveal where your partner goes and what they do. Every case is handled with full discretion and confidentiality.

Contact Global Investigations today to discover how we can help. Fill in our online form or call 0800 073 3555 (or 00 44 20 8287 7770 if overseas). Alternatively, email

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We are the highest rated private detective firm in the UK, trading  for over 29 years. Your confidentiality is prerequisite with all we do and your case will be handled with the utmost care. Ask us anything and we will be happy to assist, with no obligation to proceed at all.